Like most of you, I was excited when the mailman brought my Issue #6 of GUD last week. But unlike most of you, I was looking forward to more than just entertaining stories, poetry and stunning artwork, because you see, this issue also announced my glorious death. State Police Chairman Guillermo (Bill) Ledbetter died spectacularly, when he and his driver were blown to bits by a terrorist bomb in Lou Antonelli's "Dispatches from the Troubles." That’s right I had been the victim of...wait for it...a drive by Tuckerization.

I first learned of my untimely death in August of 2009, when I got an email from Lou, containing excerpts from the alternate history masterpiece he had just recently sold to GUD. The key line in the email, and one that made me laugh the most, was "In a bucket" Haw! We aim to please!" You see, Lou and I have been friends for years and at one of the many conventions we attended over that period, the conversation had rolled around to dying. I mentioned that instead of wasting away in some bed or falling dead in the street from a massive coronary, I would much prefer to be blown into bits so tiny, some poor slob would have to spend hours collecting my remains in a bucket.

So let that be a warning to you fine people. Never cross the Orange Klan and be very careful what you say around writers at conventions. Now I just have to come up with a suitable way to kill off a certain writer/editor that I know.

I hope at least it was a stainless steel bucket :).